Believe it or not, we have been escalating since the age of 4-5 and surprisingly we haven’t become good at it over time, in fact we haven’t changed much since the good ole’ “MOM! DAD! Bobby hit me!!” days.
We learned to escalate when we realized that involving someone else into our problems will result in action far greater than any we ourselves could exert or apply.
This worked for us as kids because it played out as a defense mechanism “I’m gonna tell mom if you hurt me” or a threat mechanism “If you do that I’m gonna tell dad”.
Surprisingly not much as changed as we grew older and moved into the workforce except for added subtlety and sexy business lingo. Perhaps you have come across this defense mechanism at work “If we have to take on any additional work we’ll have to have a discussion with [insert manager’s name]” or perhaps you’ve heard this threat mechanism “[insert manager’s name] has committed to this being done by end of day, if its not we’ll have to take it up with although I’m sure he’s not going to be happy”.
We have almost conditioned ourselves to think of escalations as a win-lose scenario!
But when you’re running projects and trying to influence positive change – whether at work or otherwise – a win-lose scenario can only get you so far without adding some resentment and friction to the relationship.
The key to escalating without implying a win-lose scenario is to level-set up-front the reasons and benefits of escalating. For example:
- Escalations are meant to move us forward as a team
- We always escalate issues NOT people
- We, collectively, will make a decision to escalate to ensure we’re all in agreement
- Escalations are a last resort after we have exhausted other options within our control
One of the biggest traps that we fall into is inconsistency. What we escalate today may not be what we escalate tomorrow, and unfortunately the speed with which we escalate may depend on WHO we’re working with. Another common pitfall is NOT communicating (to your team) your intention to escalate and that can catch them by surprise and further fuel an us vs. him/her mentality.
By doing this, we lose credibility among our peers when we escalate, even if we’re right in escalating. When you realize this, you need to pull yourself out of that trap and re-focus on the issues and facts.
Stay consistent and always ask yourself tough questions “Would I escalate this issue if my friend was working on it?” or “Would I escalate this issue if I had a different manager”, “Why am I escalating this now?” and most importantly “have I explained to my team the need behind this escalation and my intention in doing so?”
The answers to those questions should give you some insight into whether this escalation will result in a win-lose or a win-win scenario.
After all, that dorky tattletale kid may have been right but he always ate lunch alone.